3 years passed after the divorce, only one was left with the child. It doesn’t work out with men, because I want a real family and that my husband does not change. I’m beautiful, the figure is excellent, there are a lot of fans, but I don’t like them. I lived in marriage for 8 years, I did not need anything, I want to find a person who will not only be a support, a husband, a father, but will also be able to provide us normally. In addition, I really want a child. But now you have to drink sedatives, because everyone around is repeating, they say, I “get to it”. It makes me a lot. Maybe I’m very demanding, but I can’t do anything with my character and emotions.
Victoria, 29 years old
Victoria, it’s just fine that you clearly imagine what you want. Knowing your requirements, you can immediately outplay those who are not suitable, and communicate with those who will suit. Of course, the more conditions you have, the already the circle of choice, but this is your decision and your right.
In your short letter, you raise a number of questions. First, you write about relationships without change. The family in the traditional sense implies the absence of change. Why are you making such an emphasis on this? Your last marriage broke up because of this? You write that because of your desire to have a family, relationships do not develop. Why? You will demonstrate the desire to marry very early?
You put forward certain requirements for the contenders for your family, you want to see a wealthy, caring man next to you, while speaking of yourself, you describe only external data. Both men and women, choosing a partner for life, are less focused on appearance, and more on the fact that inside.
Perhaps you imagine yourself as in a letter – beautiful, with an excellent figure – accordingly, attract those who are looking for in a woman only this. There is nothing wrong with the lungs, mutually pleasant relationships for sex or leisure, but they very rarely lead to marriage. Usually people, entering into a relationship, still have an idea of what they want from them.
Seductive you drink why? How is it related to the opinions of others about your exactingness? Why do you even focus on their opinion? This is your life, and it is unlikely that friends or relatives know better than you who you want to live,
sleep, give birth to children and wash socks. Listen to yourself, no one knows better than you what is good for you and what is bad.
You also mention your emotions without describing any specific situations. You think emotions are too strong? You tend to react too sharply or simply afraid that the fact of having emotions can repel men?
If the first, then cognitive-behavioral therapy works great with similar requests. As well as with the issues of borders in order to cease to be dependent on the opinions of others. This is not an easy job, but you will have to do it.